SOMETIMES...

Sometimes I really think life sucks.
It sucks maybe or mainly bcos I am not on a right path with Jesus.
Then I will just keep blaming, whining, complaining how unfair is life.

No need to go too far, just Roy is good enough.
I always very admire, not of whether the family is rich or not.
It's just like when I want to further study,
getting a 2k from my family is like begging mum to get it from loanshark.
And that fortunate Roy has a family that can afford his studies and everything.
Yet, he just take all these for grated.

That's unfair.
I have girlfriends who are so rich, they have height, beauty, everything almost perfect.
Start to look at myself.

I don't know why, am starting to look down on myself.
For some reasons, NAFA is not replying my readmission. ):
I'm held in this company, being promoted as sales executive.
Yet I don't know should I be happy or not.
Should I stay or not?

I keep thinking, wondering, 10years down what will I bcum.
I am so afraid of everything.
Even having Roy by my side is so scary,
it's like I dont even dare to hold on hope in us.
And where will I be if I return Nafa.
And who will I become if I continue working here.

I feel like dying... ...